When gasoline soars to $8 and more across this great land please be assured that our President has a secret plan. A plan not unlike Adolf Hitler and his ‘super weapons’ or Wunderwaffen near the close of WWII. Yes, rumor has it that our Anointed One, in conjunction with the ever efficient Department of Energy, is now working on the final touches for a ‘miracle solar panel array’ or MSPA that will drastically ease America’s thirst for the ‘black stuff’ (no pun intended.
With lightening efficiency as an energy collapse rears its ugly head; Congress will step in and unveil plans to strap large solar arrays on every car, truck and bus in America. And here’s the exciting part everyone. THEY WILL BE ABSOLUTELY FREE (not including shipping and handling)! The estimated five trillion dollar cost will simply be added to the national deficit, and in the immortal words of Nancy P., will ‘be kicked so far down the road that even our grandchildren will have trouble finding it’.
The only downside to the MSPA panels will be the fact that the top speeds of most vehicles will be under 10 mph due mostly to their incredible weight. And, oh yes, they will absolutely not work on overcast days. A fact that people in cities like Seattle will need to consider…. but did you see where I used ‘lightening efficiency’ and ‘Congress’ together in the same sentence? Bet you didn’t see that coming either!